


the night belongs to us

by TazWren



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: "why should love always be tragic", A Phantom Menace, A friend like Finn, Angsty space idiots, Bendemption, Burn This AU, Burn This Broadway - Freeform, Canonical Character Death, EpIX if you squint, F/M, Grief/Mourning, House Swolo - Mistress May I, Implied Smut, Lanford Wilson, MVP Finn, My EpIX, Post-Canon, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Songfic, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, burn this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-16
Updated: 2019-05-16
Packaged: 2020-03-06 05:42:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18844783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TazWren/pseuds/TazWren
Summary: Leia's passing pushes Rey and Ben into each other's arms as they cope with their grief. Will they be able to achieve a real balance between the dark and the light side?Story inspired by Lanford Wilson'sBurn This, set to Patti Smith's'Because The Night'





	the night belongs to us

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LoveofEscapism](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveofEscapism/gifts), [midnightbluefox](https://archiveofourown.org/users/midnightbluefox/gifts), [RebelRebel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RebelRebel/gifts).



> Burn This was a powerful theatre experience and I could not get this play, Adam Driver's nuanced performance or this song out of my head... this story demanded it be written! 
> 
> For House Swolo's 'Mistress May I' gifting project : It's only appropriate that this is for the 3 HMs of The Writing Den who make it a creative and inspiration-rich space for members of the fandom! You ladies rock!

 

The passing was a silent scream that shot through the Force, pushing ripples ahead of it to break unseen, unheard. But not unfelt. 

As it washed over her, Rey straightened with a cry, dropping her tools and racing from the hangar. Even as she did, she knew it was futile. There was no coming back, not from this. 

Leia was gone. 

Poe, Kaydel, Finn and any number of the survivors of the Resistance scrambled to hold together everything that Leia had built, pulled together by the sheer force of her will, determined to stay the course she’d set them. Rey, however,  found herself turning inwards and then outwards as she reached out with tendrils of the Force. 

To the last remaining heir to Leia’s legacy. To her other. To him. 

Ben. 

 _Kylo._  

Where earlier there had always been tumultuous emotion, now she found an eerie, cold calm. One that frightened her. She’d never seen Kylo— _Ben—_ bottle within him that which could be expressed forcefully. And there was no question he would feel this deeply. No question at all.

So, why couldn’t she feel anything from him? 

 _Maybe because you left him for dead._  

It wasn’t the first time the voice in her head had chimed in, unwanted, unexpected, to berate her for not taking his hand. 

 _He’d been right there, asking you to join him. And you didn’t._  

She couldn’t give him what he wanted. That was a path she could not walk. And even imagining _what if_ was dangerous. _He_ was dangerous. 

So, why was she sitting here attempting to reach him, to find him in the Force, to… to do what? There was nothing for her there. There was nothing to be done. 

 

**

 

A furious pounding startled Rey from sleep, jerking her upright in her bunk. Crossing to the entry she keyed it open only to find it empty. And still the pounding continued. As the portal scissored closed, she shook the sleep from her eyes and realized that sound wasn’t coming from anywhere near where she was. Not even from the same planet, if planet it was. 

Then, the pounding ceased, giving way to a loud, guttural wailing. Turning she saw Kylo, on his knees onboard some destroyer or the other, screaming his anguish at the floor panels. The calm had broken, sweeping away the curtain between them. 

This time there was no hesitation, no waiting, no weighing. Running to his side, Rey dropped down, reaching a hand out, when he reared up, scrambling to his feet. 

“No! Don’t touch me. Don’t mess with me now!” he sobbed, swiping savagely at his eyes as he turned away from her. 

Even knowing that he was speaking from a place of pain, it didn’t stop the hurt from stabbing at her. Silently, sitting back on her heels, Rey watched him as he paced whatever room he was in. She couldn’t see his surroundings. Only him. 

He was wound tighter than she’d ever seen him, fists clenching as he whirled about his own orbit. The pain leaking from his every line was tearing at her, and as much as she wanted to go to him, hold him, she wouldn’t move to do that. Yet. Not until he let her. If he let her. 

In that moment Rey realized, no matter what her differences with the Supreme Leader and the First Order, she would always, always be there for Ben Solo. She would just not go to him. 

 _And where exactly does that leave you?_  

 _Nowhere._  

As she watched him vent his feelings on the walls around him, uncharacteristically using his fists instead of igniting his lightsaber, she felt the bond start to phase out, the Force pulling them apart as randomly as it threw them together, and he abruptly disappeared from her tear-blurred sight. 

 

**

 

The day was cold, bleary, wind ravaged - not unlike her own state of mind given the night that had passed. It had been the first time the bond had connected them since she had shut the Falcon’s ramp on him on Crait. 

Rey pushed the voice roughly away - don’t mess with me today, she admonished herself, echoing his words. There was too much to be done. She needed to give Poe and the Resistance her complete attention. Leia’s loss was more than just an emotional one - it left a very real gap in leadership, and things needed to be kept balanced before they splintered. Poe was the only real option, but many worried about his reliability on account of his relative youth and historical volatility. He needed every scrap of support he could muster. 

Meeting after meeting, strategy and tactics, supplies and resources, advancement or retreat - all terms that blurred together in a loud buzzing around Rey’s head as she stood behind Poe, Finn, Kaydel and just endured. It was enough that she was there. _Skywalker’s last student_ , they whispered. The last Jedi. If only they knew. 

It wasn’t her. It had never been her. Only him. 

For now, though, her presence was enough, mute as it was. It gave a semblance of strength, of hope. That which Leia always swore by. And who was she to deny them hope, even if there was none for herself?

 

**

 

This time when the Force connected them, Rey had just about given up on being able to sleep, despite how dog-tired she was. She rose to see him sitting, head in hands, on what looked like the extension of her own bunk. He shook as he cried silently, the only sound that of his breath in wet gasps, as tears dripped from between his fingers. 

Again, she crawled up beside him, closer than she had the night before, and this time he didn’t pull away from her touch. She slid her arms around his shoulders, clasping as much of his breadth as she could, laying her cheek against his back and letting him ride the storm out. Already she could feel the ragged edges start to smooth, to slow their flailing.

 _Just by your touch alone_. 

Ignoring the voice, she burrowed closer to him, pulling him into her till he was crying into her shoulder, rocking him while his breath hitched and tears kept flowing against her skin. 

“Ben, please… I know… I do... please…” She wasn’t sure what she was asking him to do, only she couldn’t stand to see him tear himself apart the way he was. 

Clasping his face, she drew it up, her heart breaking afresh at the lost look in his eyes as he searched hers. 

“I thought you-” he started saying before she cut him off, pressing a kiss to his wet face, tasting his tears on her lips. 

“Shhh, Ben. Don’t. Not now.” 

He drew back, stilling her by grasping her hands and pulling them down as he continued to search her face. The tears had stopped, she noticed, though his breathing was still ragged. As was hers. 

Then, nodding, he pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her and laying a cheek on her hair. Holding her. She’d never been held before. Not like this. 

How long they sat, she could not tell. At some point, they stretched out—she on her bunk, he presumably on his—and just held each other till sleep claimed them, wiping the ravages of grief from them, at least temporarily. 

 

_Take me now baby here as I am_

_Hold me close, try and understand_

 

**

 

When she woke he was long gone. Which was probably a good thing, for she wouldn’t have been able to explain a slumbering Kylo Ren in her bed, when Finn came bursting in a few minutes later. 

He’d let her sleep as long as he could, but she was needed urgently in the command center - there was a distressing message the Resistance had intercepted from the First Order. As Kaydel filled them in on what had been received, it appeared to be a report confirming mission completion, with a reference to clearing the path of the General. 

Since the report was addressed to General Hux, there was only one other General it could possibly indicate. Which meant that there may have been external triggers to cause Leia’s death. 

“Impossible,” Dr.Kalonia, who’d attended Leia, spoke emphatically. “Her symptoms were physiological : her heart just gave out. I would have known if there was anything inducing it. No-one beyond the people on this base had any access to Leia or anything she ate and drank. And everyone here has proven their loyalty to her many times over. There is no question of anything but a natural death.” 

An uneasy silence descended on the group as they digested this. Rey felt a vague disquiet, as though she knew what was coming next, and she wasn't far wrong when Poe raised his head and fixed her with a fierce stare, “What about the Force?” 

“What _about_ the Force?” she knew she was being deliberately obtuse but she wasn't going to put words in his mouth. Not these ones, anyhow. 

He frowned faintly, before stabbing a finger at the console before them, where the message was displayed. “Could this have been done using the Force? I wouldn't put anything past Kylo Ren, that bast-” 

“No!” Rey all but shouted, cutting Poe off. “No,” she repeated in a more normal voice, though no less decisively, holding his eyes, “I don't believe it can be done that way, and certainly not over a distance. There _are_ great distances between us and the First Order, aren’t there?” 

As Poe stared at her, Kaydel spoke up, next to him, “Yes, they are nowhere close to us now, not since their active trackers were destroyed.” 

“What about what Luke did? That was over a _very_ great distance, wasn't it?”

Rey knew why Poe was pushing. He _wanted_ to be able to pin this, something, anything on Kylo Ren, for more reasons than just the political. However, this she wasn't prepared to give him. She couldn't in all conscience, not matter what did or did not happen between Ben and her. 

“That was not the same. He projected himself on Crait. He couldn't touch you any more than you could touch him. He was a shade of himself and that cost him his life.” Rey didn't realize her voice had been getting strident as she spoke, until she stopped and the silence dropped like a clumsily-held dish. 

Still, Poe held her eyes. 

Looking between her and Poe, Finn grasped the latter by the shoulders and shook him. When Poe's attention transferred to him, unpinning Rey, Finn nodded at her, “Listen to her Poe, she knows the ways of the Force better than any of us.” 

“Yes, but I know what Ren is capable of.” Poe all but snarled. 

“Not in this.” Rey spoke with quiet emphasis. 

“How do you know that?” It was Finn who asked her this time, and she couldn't help feeling a little betrayed that he would ask. Rationally, she did know that they were entitled to ask. However, she didn't feel like she could tell them everything that had gone before. Now she wished she had spoken to Leia of it when she'd had a chance, but it was too late for that now. 

“I just… do. I can't explain it. It's a Force thing.” 

It wasn't completely a lie, the bond _was_ entirely of the Force. 

Still, it sat uneasily on her to have to resort to deception. Yet, they wouldn't understand, they wouldn't _want_ to understand. 

Everyone looked at her and then at each other before Dr.Kalonia spoke up, “Let's not get ahead of ourselves - I trust Rey if she says she knows it. Leia would have trusted her word too. What if we were _meant_ to intercept that message and perhaps give ourselves away? ” 

As ashamed as that made her feel, Rey nodded gratefully at the woman who just thrown her a lifeline. 

Kaydel spoke slowly as she scanned the message again. “It is possible, it hasn't any encryption beyond the normal. And I'm not sure a communique to Hux would be this open. It could be a ruse.” 

Shortly after this pronouncement, things moved into areas more mundane and Rey was filled with relief when the meeting finally broke up.  It didn't stop the occasional look Finn shot at her, though. He'd known her the longest and she was sure he could sense something was not alright. 

Taking care to avoid being where he could get her alone and question her, Rey pushed herself from task to task across the base, letting herself be sucked into activities so she wouldn't have a moment of free time. Not to talk to Finn. Not to think. Especially not to think. 

 

**

 

It was as though all her efforts to not dwell on Ben or the events of the previous night only made the capricious Force more determined to connect them. As she stepped out of the 'fresher, having surrendered under the hot water jets to wash the day's grime off of her, he materialized not a foot away from her, pacing like a cornered Tusk cat, pulling at his hair.

Stopping abruptly, Rey tightened her grip on her towel, self-consciousness washing over her. She'd never been unclothed in front of another person before. That it was _him_ made it even harder for her to catch her breath. Her thoughts flashed back to that time she'd seen him bare-chested. The first time she'd entertained the possibility that Kylo Ren may _just_ be as much a victim in all that had passed. 

Sensing her, Ben whipped around—for it was Ben who faced her, with those bottomless eyes filled with pain—and extended his hand to her, fingers unfurling as he did. The moment that she paused stretched like an eternity between them before she reached out and slipped her hand into his palm, letting him draw her close. 

There were no words, no speech between them, just a blind elemental acceptance of each other, of the will of the Force in that instance, demanding balance. 

As lips and hands wandered, both driven by frenzy and slowed to match their heartbeats, the dark descended on them, granting them the reprieve of the night as they came together for the very first time. 

 

_Desire is hunger is the fire I breathe_

_Love is a banquet on which we feed..._

 

_Come on now try and understand_

_The way I feel when I'm in your hands_

_Take my hand come undercover_

_They can't hurt you now,_

_Can't hurt you now, can't hurt you now_

 

**

 

The pattern of their lives changed around their nightly connections. While it was by no means a regular occurrence, it was still often enough that Ben would appear to her, just as the night cycle began. Grief was always the trigger, either hers or his, for the Force to throw them together. And in those moments, held in his arms, she allowed herself to completely mourn the woman who had become the mother she had only dreamt of. It was ironic, or perhaps poetic, that it was Leia's son who was Rey's only source of comfort. And more.

She didn't know what to term what they were to each other. Only that they oscillated wildly between burning to cinders at first touch, or holding each other softly through the night as the tears made tracks. 

It weighed on her, having let him as close as she had, that they were no closer to resolving their stances than they had been that fateful day on the _Supremacy_. Not that they spoke of it - they never spoke of anything beyond Leia and their shared pain, if they ever did. That somehow made it both easier and more difficult to live with - like they were painting a facade over a building with no foundation. 

Yet, everyday that she woke up with the bed empty beside her,  a small part of her died. She had no plan for this, no conception of how to survive it once this time was past. And she had no doubts that it would pass, for no-one could mourn forever. Not even Ben Solo. 

However, so long as he remained Kylo Ren, she had no hope of anything beyond the moments taken from the night. 

This shouldn’t have happened, it shouldn’t be happening, but it had and it was. 

She was a scavenger, after all. Even he'd called her that. So she would do what she did best. Scavenge the memories and use them to fix her broken pieces. After this was all done.

She knew there could be no future to what they had. Not like this. 

 _He won’t like it._  

He didn’t have to like it. 

For now, she just let herself feel, turning into his arms like it was the most natural thing in the galaxy.

 

_Have I doubt when I'm alone..._

_Love is an angel disguised as lust_

_Here in our bed until the morning comes_

 

_With love we sleep_

_With doubt the vicious circle_

_Turns and burns_

_Without you I cannot live_

_Forgive, the yearning burning_

_I believe it's time, too real to feel_

_So touch me now, touch me now, touch me now_

 

**

 

The day cycles wore on Rey as much as her nights, both granting and taking her rest from her in equal measure. It was during one such morning, after a night of strenuous indulgence, that Finn found her drooping over her rations in the mess hall. As he slid into the seat opposite her, Rey realized she’d forgotten all about his questioning looks and of being asked for difficult answers. 

It was a measure of her disquiet that she actually welcomed him this time, not having realized just how long it had been since she last had a conversation with Finn. 

Observing her silently for a moment, Finn reached out and stopped her hand that was fiddling with a spoon, playing with her food, and bent to ask her in a low voice, “Rey, are you alright? What’s going on? You know you can tell me.” 

Almost ready to protest, she paused - what was the point of it all. Surrounded by all these people, she had never felt more alone. And having tasted what it felt like to _have_ someone who wanted her, for whatever warped reason, she found her ability to endure eroding. 

Sighing, Rey dropped her spoon back in her largely-untouched food; a crime in and of itself, but she couldn’t find it in her to eat. Pushing back from the table she canted her head towards the outdoors, “Walk with me?” 

They wandered in silence, skirting the more populated areas by unspoken agreement. It was Finn who finally spoke, drawing her to a halt at the edge of the landing field,  as they completed their second circuit of the base. 

“Does this have anything to do with what Poe was asking you earlier? About the Force?” 

She nodded. That wasn’t a lie, after all. 

Pressing his lips in a thin line, Finn watched her closely before asking in a tight voice, more direct this time, “Does this have to do anything with Kylo Ren?” 

“Ben” she corrected him.

 _Well that’s one way to go._  

“What?” he started at her in confusion. 

“You heard what Han called him on Starkiller - he called him Ben.” 

Realizing how close she was to letting her mental and physical exhaustion give the entire story away, Rey tried to deflect. 

“Yes, but what does that have to do with anything?” 

Feeling the sudden need to sit, not trusting herself to remain standing, she dropped to the ground gracelessly, prompting Finn to quickly squat next to her.   

Before he could say anything, she spoke, keeping her eyes on her fingers as they pulled at the grass by her crossed legs. 

“Everything. He’s their son. That’s why Han went to him. That’s why I know he didn’t have anything to do with what happened to Leia.” 

“Rey!” Finn exclaimed, “He _killed_ his own father! Who’s to say he didn’t do that with his mother as well?” 

She couldn’t go on alone. She wanted to tell him. She needed to tell him. So she did. 

Rey told him the whole tale, every bit, in a monotone: finding Luke, the disappointment, the training, Luke’s recounting of Ben’s fall, the Force bond, finding in Ben that other who knew what it was to be alone - who promised she was not alone, the truth she finally heard from Luke, her going to the Supremacy, Ben saving her from Snoke only to abandon her friends, her subsequent abandonment of him. Then the bond reconnecting after Leia. And how it kept reconnecting them. 

It was only there that she choked and stopped to fight back tears. At this point Rey wasn’t even sure who they were for - Leia, Ben or for herself. 

Finn gaped at her, his mouth opening and shutting inarticulately before he managed to gasp out a response to everything that had been thrown at him. 

“ _Kylo Ren_ killed Snoke to save your life?!” 

 _Bless him for focusing on the most important point._  

Rey nodded, fingers pressed to her lips as she visibly swallowed against a wave of emotion. Noticing her distress, Finn slung an arm across her shoulders, rubbing in slow circles to soothe her. 

“Its okay, Rey, we’ll figure this out together - you aren’t alone, you-” Finn broke off as Rey sobbed and buried her face in her hands, “Ah, okay… right… sorry.” 

He pulled her in for a hug and let her cry for a few minutes before speaking up. 

“So, you and Kylo Ren, huh? I have to admit, this is _very_ hard to wrap my head around. If this was anyone but you, I would say he’d messed with you using the Force.” 

As she reared up to glare at him, Finn hurried on, “I’m not saying that’s the case here - I know you’re as strong as, if not stronger than, him.” Pausing, he smirked down at her, “Who’d have thought, the girl who beat the pants off of him, is the one to… well… you know...” 

“Finn, if you make one stupid joke about his pants, Maker help me, you’ll be very sorry. And he’s not Kylo. He’s Ben.” Rey’s voice was tight from the crying, but it did nothing to diminish the indignant fire in her eyes. 

Sobering, Finn switched his hold to her hands as he took a deep breath, “Rey, you see him as Ben. However, it doesn’t change anything if he’s still the Supreme Leader. Not unless he’s throwing them over to join you.” 

Here he stopped, to look down and away, frowning in thought. 

“The Resistance took me in, no questions asked, but we both know that is not going to be the case for him. Not after everything.” 

“I know,” Rey whispered miserably, “I don’t know what to do, Finn. And I’m just so tired.” 

“Have you talked to him about where this is going?” 

“We never talk - not really. Never more than about Leia.” She shook her head, staring blindly down at their clasped hands as Finn sighed. He didn’t bother saying anything - they both knew what she needed to do. 

_A nice mess you’ve gotten yourself into._

 

**

 

Though the hum of the Force warned her, Ben still caught her by surprise, coming up behind her and running his hands up her arms as he buried his face in her hair. For just a beat, she let him - who knew if this was the last time he would hold her. 

Then, just as he slipped an arm around her waist to anchor her to him, his lips running gently along her jaw, she twisted away. 

“Ben, stop. You can’t keep doing this, _I_ can’t keep doing this.” Rey stepped back till she could see his face without craning. 

The confusion on his face was overtaken by such open pain, she was back on the salt moon again, watching him on his knees as his eyes begged her to stay with him, not leave him. Not give up on him, like everyone else had. 

It almost made her want to give in, almost. 

“Why? How come?” he rasped as he stood, preternaturally still.

“ _Why?_ Because nothing’s changed Ben, we’re still the same people we were before. We are still on the same sides we were.” 

He broke to take a step towards her, but Rey backed away, making him halt, vibrating as he tried to hold himself in control.

“Don’t, please don’t.” her voice was thickening, but she needed to press on and get the words out while she still could. And Rey knew if he touched her, she wouldn’t be able to. 

“You didn’t seem to mind it so much when I touched you before, when you fell apart under me. What changed? Or was it all a lie?” His voice was harsh, no more than she expected even if his words speared through her. 

Miserably, she shook her head. 

“No,” she whispered, “It wasn’t a lie. But what we’re doing? Or what you think we’re doing? How is _this_ not a lie, Ben? Would this have even happened if we weren't trying to cope with our grief? Or is this just because the Force bonded us?”

She could see his trembling hands clenching into fists, spasming as he stared at her, pain and anger warring across his features. 

“You know I can never join the First Order, and you - you hate everything I stand for.” 

“Not you. Never you.” He spoke quickly, shaking his head to negate the thought. 

“The Resistance, then. How is that any different? Leia & Han, they both _died_ believing in what the Resistance stands for. And that you are not all dark. They always only wanted you to come back to the light. Where you belong.” 

Shuddering where she stood, Rey continued. “You won’t turn and I can’t join you. _Nothing_ has changed between us. This, whatever this is, is just tearing me apart, Ben. And I don’t want this, I don’t _want_ it. I don’t want _you_. Not like this.” 

She saw the moment her words slammed into him, his body bowing as though absorbing a physical blow. Time seemed to stand still as she watched him till he finally straightened, raising his head to look at her, his face calm, but his eyes burning like coals. 

When he walked towards her, she found she was frozen in her spot, watching him move as though his whole body was in pain. Maybe it was, after all, she felt like a herd of bantha had stampeded over her. 

She didn’t step away this time. Instead she waited as he closed the distance between them. He reached up to cup her face, and pressed a chaste kiss to her forehead. It was not what she had expected. As his lips left their imprint on her, Rey could feel herself splintering under their weight. She knew what a goodbye looked like, felt like. And she knew she’d lost him. 

Just as he drew away, his hand starting to slide away from her face, the door opened. Finn entered with a datapad in hand and slammed to a halt, his mouth falling open as he saw who was with her. 

Ben’s face hardened, Kylo emerging as his mouth twisted into a sneer. “FN-2187.” 

“Finn.” The other man corrected, lifting his chin defiantly as he stared Kylo down, the steel in his voice evident as he countered. 

“Surprised you haven’t run at the sight of me, already. Or have you finally grown a backbone?” Kylo sneered, the disdain in his voice barely hiding the underlying throb  of betrayal, his fingers tightening against Rey’s face before he closed his eyes and blew out a breath. “Whatever, it makes no difference to me. Not anymore. You stay, I’ll go.” 

Giving Rey a long searching look, he finally dropped his hand and stepped away. 

Finn gasped as the third occupant of the room, by all counts, simply began to disappear from his sight. 

Rey remained where she stood, though, staring at Ben as he backed away from her, her voice cracking as she challenged him, “You know you can’t leave at will. That’s not how this works.” 

“Oh yeah? Well maybe it's time one of us made the effort.” 

And with that he was gone. Whether it was the Force or his own doing, she didn’t know. Only that the finality of his going left her feeling colder than she had ever been in her life, with a great roaring in her ears. 

She dimly sensed Finn saying something to her, reaching out to shake her, but nothing penetrated the wall of ice surrounding her. Wordlessly turning away from him, she crawled onto her bunk and lay down, closing her eyes as the pain carried her away.  

 

**

 

Time passed in a daze for Rey, the days and nights yawing into each other, like toffee being pulled on a hot summer’s day. She stumbled through her daily tasks and meetings on auto-pilot, and fell into her bunk at the end of the day in a zombie-like state. The worried glances that were thrown rolled off her with the barest impact. It might have been days or weeks since she sent Ben away, but it made no difference to Rey who sank deeper into a stupor of her own making.

Yet, when the Force was permeated by the sense of a dark awakening, a malevolent dissonance spreading insidiously across the Galaxy, even she could not ignore it. Snapping back to the world around her for the first time in days, Rey urgently cast about to make sense of what she was feeling. The tremors in the Force were unlike anything she’d experienced before, it was definitely not Ben. This she knew in her bones. 

Something was coming. Something very bad. 

The speed at which its menacing presence strengthened in the Force told her there was danger coming. 

She needed to warn everyone. 

Dropping her tools from the perfunctory repairs she’d been making to a disabled X-Wing, Rey raced for the command center, uncaring of her grease-streaked state. 

She bursting in on Poe, in conversation with Finn and Kaydel, who stopped mid-sentence to stare at her as she struggled to catch her breath. 

“The Force!” she gasped, “There’s been an awakening. Something dark is coming. I can feel it.”

“What are you talking about, Rey? What’s coming?” Finn crossed to her, taking her by the arms to steady her as she swayed on her feet.

“I’m not sure, Finn - I just felt this _presence_ awaken, and it's worse than anything I've encountered. It’s a threat to us, I can feel the menace in it.” 

“Ren.” Poe growled, anger starting to mar his features. 

“No, this isn’t him. This is something I’ve never felt before. It’s… extremely powerful.” Desperate for them to understand, Rey looked from Finn to Poe and back again. “We need to be ready. This is something else.” 

“How do you know it isn’t Ren or his Knights?” Poe came to stand in front of her her, fists on his hips as he demanded a response. 

She shook her head, “I tell you this is _not_ Kylo Ren. I know what he feels like.” 

As Poe blinked at her words, Rey flushed realizing what she’d said. “In the Force. I know what he feels like in the Force. This is not his doing. This is bigger than anything I know. And it _feels_ like something rotting around me.” She grimaced as she tried to explain the miasma she could sense. 

“Rey, what do we need to do? How do we prepare?” Finn drew her attention back to him. 

“I...” she threw her hands up as she looked around, “Switch our sensor arrays over to active scanning? I know they're passive right now, but we need to be ready to fight.” 

Poe gave her a long searching look before beckoning Kaydel over. “Kay, get me a complete status rundown of all units as well as supplies. Also, I’m going to need to know the latest from the allies we’ve contacted. Have our sensor arrays switch over like Rey said — if something is heading our way, we will want as much of a heads-up as we can get. By the end of the day, I want our forces ready to mobilize in a half hour. If we need to step up readiness, we can take a call once we know more.” 

Kaydel nodded and left the room, gathering her datapad as she did. 

Turning back to Rey, Poe took in her state and his face softened, “Rey, we’ll get everything else in place, but it won’t mean a thing if this is a fight between Force users. I need you to be ready as well.” 

Straightening, Rey pushed Finn’s arm off, bristling at the implicit suggestion. “I can do whatever needs to be done.” 

Laying a hand on her shoulder Poe shook his head. “Not in this shape you won’t. You need to rest, reconnect, meditate or whatever it is you Jedi do. You’ve been running yourself to the bone this past week, and I won’t hesitate to order you to rest.” A smile quirked his mouth as he continued, “Your dark circles have dark circles right now.” 

Despite herself, Rey barked a reluctant laugh at that. It meant something, surely, that she could feel more than just numbness even if she looked like hell. 

Steering her towards the door, Poe gave her a little push. “I don’t want to see you back on your feet till the next cycle. And that _is_ an order. Get some rest, Rey. We’re going to need you.” 

Suddenly feeling the tiredness in her bones dragging her downwards, Rey gave in, and returned to her quarters with a heavy tread, exhaustion starting to catch up as she did.

 

**

 

Poe watched her leave, a thoughtful look on his face before he turned to Finn. 

“How sure do you think she is that Ren has nothing to do with this new... whatever it is?” 

Finn continued to stare at the closed door, before he sighed and looked at his commander and friend. “Rey knows what she’s talking about - I trust her judgement on this and so should you.” 

Putting his hands up, as though to fend him off, Poe exclaimed, “I do trust her, but I’ve also seen what Kylo Ren is capable of, first-hand.” 

“She knows him better than any of us.” The words were out before he could stop them. 

“What do you mean? Because she’s a Jedi?” Poe frowned.

Shaking his head, Finn blew out a long breath before casting a quick glance at the door and lowering his voice. “Poe, I’m about to tell you something that isn’t mine to share. But I think you need to know why Rey is so certain. We need to focus on what the real threat is. And this stays between us.” 

“Finn, buddy, you know you can trust me.” Poe spread his hands expansively. 

“She knows what he is, _and_ what he isn’t. They are connected somehow by the Force - something that happened when she was on Ahch-To. Which is why she went to the _Supremacy_. To bring him back.” 

Seeing Poe open his mouth, Finn rushed on before he could say a word, “Rey didn’t kill Snoke. It was him. To save her.” 

Poe stared at Finn for a long moment before he laughed incredulously. “You’re kidding, right? Kylo Ren? The man responsible for slaughtering so many people? He killed his own Master, for Rey?” 

When Finn did not respond, he grew serious. “Wait, you really believe this? It’s probably some mindtrick of his to mess with Rey. To manip-” 

“I saw him with her,” Finn interrupted brusquely, “The bond is real. And if anything, she has him on the end of a string.” 

“Saw him? When? Where?” Poe asked sharply, straightening as he did. 

“About a week ago, when I went to her room to show Rey some readouts.” 

“Wait, he was with her? In her quarters? Then he knows where we are!” Poe’s voice rose in agitation. 

“No!” Finn put a hand out, trying to calm Poe, “Listen to me, he doesn’t know where we are. They can only see each other, nothing else, unless they’re touching. The only reason I saw him and heard him was because, well…” Here he paused before taking a deep breath, “He was holding her. He doesn’t know anything about where we are or how to reach us.” 

“Why didn’t you tell me this right away, Finn? And why was he _holding_ her?!” 

“It wasn’t my place to do so. There was no threat from Kylo Ren, which is why I didn’t escalate it. As for the rest - Poe, they are bonded by the Force, they can see and feel things about each other none of us can even imagine. They are, or were, close.” he finished lamely, not wanting to let Poe know the full extent of the closeness. 

“Were?” 

Sighing, Finn nodded. “Yeah, she sent him away. I’ve never seen a man look so crushed.” 

“Our Rey crushed him? At least that sounds about right.” 

“Listen, Poe - I told you this so you know why she’s as certain as she is. There is no way that Kylo Ren can put something past her. She needs you to trust her completely. And don’t bring this up. Not unless she does.” 

Looking down at the ground, Poe shook his head before glancing up from under his brow. “So, Ren likes Rey, huh? Maybe that can work in our favor someday. Fine, I won’t say anything. But the next time something happens, I need to know about it sooner and not later. I’m not just your friend anymore, Finn, and I’m responsible for all these lives.” 

Ducking his head at the chastisement, Finn nodded. He prayed he wouldn't have to, but he had a nagging feeling he might not have a choice.

 

**

 

Later that day, after leaving Poe, Finn decided to get some rations and check in on Rey. Letting himself into her room, though, he found her passed out,  looking as though she had just fallen face-first onto her bunk.

Pulling her boots off Finn eased her into a more comfortable position then, tucking the covers around her, he retreated to sit down against the wall across from her. Something told him to stay with her, make sure she remained okay. 

Just as he leaned his head back, about to close his eyes, he jolted up at the sight of Kylo materializing in front of him. Kylo was bent over Rey and brushing the hair off her face before he realized he had an audience and froze. 

The two men stared at each other and when there was no overt aggression evident from his long-time nemesis Finn slowly rose to his feet holding his hand up, palm out. 

Kylo—no, _Ben_ —looked at him intently for a long moment before he turned his gaze back to Rey’s sleeping form. 

“What’s wrong with her? I can feel how drained she is.” he asked in a stiff voice, evidently not happy about having to look to Finn for answers. 

“She’s just sleeping, but she’s been working like a dog since, well, after you left.” Finn offered, softly. It wasn’t exactly an olive branch, but then, they evidently had their concern for Rey in common, even if nothing else. 

Ben’s mouth tightened at that, his brow furrowing as he looked down at her, his fingers still absently smoothing against her face. 

Come to think of it, he looked pretty haggard himself, his face drawn sharply, with shadows in his eyes. 

Watching his ministrations silently, Finn remembered how Ben had seen him hesitate, back on Jakku, and yet had done nothing to eliminate him. Deciding then, to gamble on a feeling he had, Finn asked, “Listen, do you know anything about an awakening in the Force? Rey said something about feeling a new presence.” 

Ben’s head whipped around to pin him with a hard stare. “She said that? She felt it?” 

Finn nodded, watching as Ben swung back towards Rey. He lowered himself to perch on the edge of her bunk murmuring as though to himself, “Of course she did, she’s as strong as I am, maybe even more.” 

Casting a quick look at Finn, Ben went on, “That’s what I wanted to warn her about. I… she…” he paused, his jaw working as he tried to say something but couldn’t. 

“I know.” At Finn’s quiet declaration Ben frowned, but didn’t say anything further, looking away instead. 

Taking a step closer, Finn asked him a question that had been nagging at him ever since he’d seen them together. “You really care about her, don’t you? Even I can see that.” 

The look on Ben’s face was answer enough for him, the stark look of loss and longing could not be faked. Making up his mind, Finn quickly pulled a scrap of thin plastic film from his pocket and proceeded to scribble something on it. He thrust it at Ben who looked questioningly between the slip and his face.

“Look, if she means as much to you as you obviously do to her, then the two of you belong together, dark, light, gray, whatever. And if this new thing is as much of threat as she says, then it makes sense that two will be stronger than one.” As Ben slowly caught his meaning and stared up at him, Finn nodded and motioned forward with the film again, “Only you can make that happen. If you decide to, then you can reach me here. If you don’t, well, then… just burn this, maybe.” 

Slowly, as though he was approaching a wild animal, Ben reached out and curled his fingers around the scrap of film, curling it into his fist. 

Sticking his hands in his pockets, Finn backed away, towards the entryway. “I'll give you some time alone with her, but I'm going to be right outside this door. So don't try anything stupid. I won't hesitate to shoot you just because Rey likes you.” He warned, though the half smile that reluctantly showed on Ben's face told him it was not necessary. 

“Of course you won't.” His voice was almost amused as he looked down at Rey. 

Then, as Finn turned to leave, he heard from behind him, softly, “Thank you.”

 

**

 

The days after were filled with a rush of being in a constant state of preparation. For Rey, this meant not only ensuring all the flights under her care were in prime condition, but also making sure she herself was prepared.

She increased her practice sessions with her staff, no longer having a lightsaber to work with, focusing instead on strengthening other aspects of her hold on the Force. The punishing routine, even when coupled with hours of meditation, was exhausting. Yet, it helped her feel much lighter than she had for days. Now she something to focus her energies on, instead of drifting in an emotionless vacuum.

Everyone around her spun in their own busy orbits, and though she wished she could see more of Finn, he was always speeding away in the opposite direction. If she didn’t know better, she would think he was avoiding her.

As the days passed, the base remained battle-ready; the scans initiated after Rey's warning showed large movements of vessels around known First Order locations. Their enemy seemed to be mobilising as well, which made their preparedness even more vital. 

There was still nothing Rey could sense about the new threat, beyond the sense of its looming presence. Not for the last time did she wish she still had Luke to teach her what needed to be done. 

 _You need a teacher._  

Her treacherous subconscious threw his words at her, every time she paused. If only, if only… 

At the end of a gruelling day and at Finn's urging, having finally managed to get some time with him over a meal, Rey trudged back to her quarters. The night cycle would be over soon enough, and she was to be back on hangar duty the next morning. 

Pushing her way into the room, she stopped abruptly, staring at the room's occupant before she sighed and turned away to set her staff against a corner. 

“I can't do this, Ben. Not now. Please leave me alone.” 

“That may make it a little difficult, since I don't have anywhere else to go.” His voice was quiet, calm. 

“What?” she frowned but didn't turn around. 

“Rey, look at me. Please.” 

Looking at him over her shoulder, Rey started to fend him off before something caught her eye. In all the time she'd known him, as Kylo as well as Ben, he'd always worn black. 

 _Or nothing at all_.

Now, he sat on her bunk in a dun colored shirt, and dark blue pants.

As she stared at him, trying to make sense of why he looked like he was wearing Finn's clothes, he straightened and walked up to her, pausing when he was close enough to touch.

“What are you doing?” She asked hoarsely, not believing what she was seeing. 

Reaching out, he took her boneless hand and pressed it against his chest, his heart beating rapidly under her palm, belying the calm on his face. 

“I came, Rey. I couldn’t stay away.” 

That was when Rey noticed that she couldn't hear the normal hum of the Force around them — this wasn't a Force connection. This was real. 

He was here. 

In her room. 

On the Resistance base. 

She drew a sharp breath as she realized what he'd done. And what that meant. 

“How?” She whispered. 

“Finn.” As though that one word would explain everything. 

“Finn? I don’t understand... why?”

Huffing, Ben looked away, his eyes unfocused as he spoke, “Damned if I know why. We… talked. I needed to warn you, and Finn was watching over you when the bond connected. He gave me a way to contact him, and when I did he helped me get here undetected.”

“Wait, warn me about what? Have you felt something too? Is that why you're here?” she gripped his shirt, an urgency taking over. 

“Yes, there’s been an awakening, only this is not a new power. This is something ancient rising again - I’ve been reading the old texts and I fear I know who and what this is.”

He stopped to tighten his hand over hers, his eyes desperate.

“Rey, I think this is one of the Sith rising, somehow. This is stronger than anything _either_ of us have faced alone. If you were to go up against this alone, if something happened to you… I _had_ to come, Rey. You were right, there is a lot of dark in me, but there is light as well - I don't think I can survive that light getting snuffed out.” 

Lifting her hand he pressed a kiss to her fingers. 

Rey drew a shuddering breath - he meant her. She was his light. He cared enough about her to put his liberty, his _life_ at risk. For there was no doubt about what would happen once the Resistance found out who was now among them. There would need to be a reckoning. Not to mention this new danger they had to face. Knowing this, yet, he’d come. 

Flipping her hand over so that it now held his, against the warmth of his chest, she looked at their linked fingers and then up at him. 

“Together then, we face this together.” A smile pulled at a corner of her lips, as she went on, “I need a teacher.” 

The answering smile that bloomed across his face was almost worth all the heartbreak that had gone before. It faded quickly though, as he raised her chin with his free hand. 

“You should know, I’m not going back to the First Order. There’s still the matter of what happens next, here.” 

“Oh Ben, I wish you’d come home while the General… while Leia was still with us!” Fear flashed through Rey at the thought of him being ripped away just when she’d finally found him. 

“I have you. And—it appears—Finn as well. The traitor is a good friend to you.” He smiled when Rey frowned at the term. “Don’t worry, I’m not exactly in a position to call him that anymore.” 

Resolutely,  she shook her head. “I won’t let them hurt you.” 

“It may be beyond even you, my Scavenger, but that will be a matter for later. Finn is going to keep my presence on the base a secret till tomorrow, when I face your commander. For now, there’s tonight, and just us. And whatever you want.” 

Lowering his head to look her in the eye, Ben asked softly, “What do you want, Rey?”

There was no hesitation as she met his lips in a soft kiss that slowly deepened. When she pulled away, a lifetime after, she brushed his hair off his brow and smiled. 

“You. I want you, Ben.”

 

_Because tonight there are two lovers_

_If we believe in the night we trust_

_Because the night belongs to lovers_

_Because the night belongs to us_

 

***

  
  
  
  


 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Big love to Dee, Riel and Em who helped keep me on the straight and narrow by betaing this flight of fancy 💙


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